My love affair with TV

From when I was about 8 until the beginning of my teens, my favourite programme was That’s so Raven. Raven Symone was my hero, and I give her all the credit for my spicy personality and incredible dress sense. That’s so Raven was the TV programme which started it all. I would run home from school and watch as many episodes as I could in one night, as much as I would like to say that this has changed; it hasn’t. When Desperate Housewives was on (RIP Wisteria Lane), my life was complete and since then I have been filling that hole with as many programmes as I can fit in.

There’s something about amazingly well crafted TV programmes that I just can’t resist. It’s the hot guys, the theme tune, the drama, the comedy and the way one episode can practically leave me with tears of joy/excitement/anticipation/fear. Some say I get to involved in programmes (hey mum) but I say that I am the reason why these TV is where it is today. In all seriousness, where would 90210 be without sad, lonely, obsessed, confused teenage girls like me be? And I’m sorry but I’m sure Lena Dunham stole the idea for Girls from my dreams because that is EXACTLY how I have planned out my future life (minus the unfortunate events and with hotter guys, please and thank you God). 

If I had a choice between getting married and never being able to watch TV or having unlimited, free access to all the TV in the world but being single forever, then I’d kill myself because I want the D, but I love TV (I’m also a poet). 

What I’m watching right now:

  • Game of thrones
  • Supernatural (by force, not by choice)
  • Girls
  • 90210
  • Gossip Girl (yes I know it’s finished but I’m pretending it hasn’t okay?)
  • House
  • Chicago Fire
  • True Blood
  • The New Normal
  • New Girl
  • Modern Family
  • Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
  • Pretty Little Liars
  • Workaholics
  • Revenge
  • Awkward

I’m not looking at your face, I’m looking at your eyebrows

I always thought that grooming yourself meant showering once a day and shaving your armpits, however as I grew into a more worldly human being I realised that nothing says well groomed better than a nicely shaped pair of eyebrows.

Everywhere I go, I’m scrutinising women’s eyebrows; they can’t be too thick and they can’t be too thin (dear god, that is a crime). I love it when I see someone who clearly cares about her eyebrows, and showers them with love and affection. To me, that is someone who likes to look good. There’s this one girl at work, who has the most horrendous eyebrows I have ever seen in my life. It’s just one thin black line of hair so high up on her forehead, it’s like they are hiding from her eyes. One day, out of curiosity I asked her if she had just recently go them threaded.

She replied (in a really chavvy, annoying voice) “Yeh, I did actually. They look beyootiful don’t they?”

Me: “Yeah, they look really nice! (no they don’t)”

Her: “I like ’em quite fin I fink it looks betta like dis.”

I didn’t have the strength or patience to tell her how disgusting they looked, I wasn’t in the mood for an argument that day but even though it saddened me to see so little hair on her face, it gave me that boost I needed to write this post.

If you can’t afford to thread/wax them then tweezers will do. Only tweeze the excess hair, pleeaaaasseee don’t get excited and start plucking hair from every corner. Shape your eyebrows from underneath, not every one suits an arch – sometimes it’s just enough to get rid of the unwanted ones to make it look tidier. Also, don’t forget to pluck the stray hairs in the middle and I’d recommend getting a relatively good tweezer so you can reach those pesky tiny hairs.

If you’re going to go down the threading route, then avoid anyone who does it for £5 or more. I go to this amazing Indian lady, she only charges £2.50 and I walk out feeling like Beyonce. If you’re worried about the pain then you should be because the first time I went I nearly cried and my mum still squeals like a little bitch every time we go.

Luckily I was born with pretty nice eyebrows, so I don’t need to do much with them. However, when you leave the house and go about your day just remember that someone out there is looking at those bushy caterpillars on your head.

Why it’s okay to stay home on a Friday night

If you’re like me and never get invited to parties/events/social gatherings, then this post is for you.

Right now, I’m watching pretty little liars (which is really scary btw) and thinking about how wonderful my weekend has been so far. Normally, every weekend is shit. I wake up, do my chores then I do nothing for the rest of the day. This weekend has actually been like every other weekend but whilst I was hoovering the living room I realised that it didn’t matter that I didn’t get dry humped on the dance floor,  I actually got to do things I enjoy this weekend.

I watched 5 episodes of pretty little liars, I watched Crazy, Stupid, Love (Ryan Gosling father my children please), I FINALLY updated to iOS 6 and I had my first driving lesson.

So to everyone who thought that they had a shit Friday/Saturday night, remember all the fun things you got up to on your own. Watching TV is always better than getting drunk on cheap vodka.

Also, WHAT THE FUCK PRETTY LITTLE LIARS! I’m not going to sleep tonight